Photograph of grandpa Samuel probably shortly after his arrival in the U.S.

This is a topic I’ve always wondered about. The possibility that there is an angel on my shoulder.

Yesterday I got an answer. I’d like to believe it.

A friend sent me a link to a blogtalkradio program. The guest on the show was a social worker my friend worked with in a school a few years back, Richard Scheinberg Richard  discusses a subject from his new book, Seeking Soul Mates, Spirit Guides, and Past Lives.He went on to augment his practice in esoteric studies. He specializes in past life regression. This is something I’ve always thought about doing but it had a creepy edge. The feeling of loss of control, of something painful happening or faced again. From what was discussed it seemed like a fairly easy process and the control freaks verified there was no feeling of lack of control. The mind is brought to a restful state, kind of a pre-sleep state.

I have issues with driving and speed. I can drive locally but highway driving terrifies me. I was unable to drive for 12 years after my first husband died; I had taken him to the hospital and then he expired from an ongoing illness; I became car phobic. I worked it out with medication and therapy and regained my independence, but I am still terrified of highways. When I am in the passenger seat I am grateful I am not driving, but part of me is still in a state of vigilant crash-alert.

I think it is very possible that in a former life I died in a car crash. I have to think about whether I want to explore this further.

The lecture/interview was hosted by a medium. It didn’t dawn on me until much later. I mean I know consciously what they do but the word didn’t click; she’s been talking to spirits since she was 5.

I called in to ask a question and she asked me to email her so we could set up a file transfer online through messenger. She had a lovely meditation to send me.

During the time we were online chatting I indicated that I had some questions and I wanted to schedule a reading with her on the phone. We had a close connection spiritually, and in her giving way, she spontaneously began to tell me…( I have saved the archive of the chat and will consult it)

I mentioned that a protocol for breast cancer patients is an MRI. While in the machine a couple of years ago, in the most uncomfortable face down position, enduring the banging and clanging, I heard a man’s voice call my name: Susan! I picked my head up–there was a speaker in the machine so I could communicate with the technician–and asked, yes, what, hello? No response. This happened during a lull of quiet between the clanging episodes and it happened again. Name call and no answer.

Later when the technician was helping me up I asked why he was calling me. He said he didn’t.

The medium knew the answer. A man indeed. An elder in robes, a man wiser than Einstein. I was his wife ages and ages ago. We were on a council together.

Now that sounds a little far fetched. It was the time of Atlantis. Hmmm. But I began to get the strangest feeling in my gut. I told her I felt excitement, awe, elation, butterflies.

Understand: I have had many interesting odd experienced in my life that cannot be explained. I call it heightened senses. I have predicted many deaths by looking at a person, untimely ones; young friends and husband, my father, my father-in-law, it goes on and on, that’s another post. So I am open to what cannot be explained. But Atlantis? I had reservations. And not to go there. I figured, let’s see how this conversation continues. After all she is not connecting to my voice, just my typed words. As for the ability to predict near-future deaths, it is a gift, an ability to foresee, make peace and let go. Before any one around me could.

Let’s continue:

What does the name Samuel mean to you?, she asked, he said.. “she will know me by Samuel.”
Immediately I said, my grandfather! I never knew him. He saw me when I was 6 months old and died shortly after of a heart condition. I remember my mother telling me of his visit and how he kissed me on the cheek.
The photo above was hanging in my grandmother’s bedroom for years. She survived long after my  grandfather was gone. I remember the first time I saw it, I was mesmerized at how handsome this young fellow was. Shortly after I found a boyfriend who looked very much like him. The photo has been hanging on my hallway wall for years, next to my grandmother’s.

She told me, Samuel was my husband in another life. That he was standing next to me. That he had to go over to the other side but he “wanted to see my face in flesh and kiss my cheeks.” I had chills at the mention of cheek. I am not sure if she meant he was kissing me now or as a baby.

Another male figure came through and said my father drank–he never did–never. But he suffered from depression and alcohol is a depressant. But he surely loved his cigars! The message was muddled. Who was this man? “A heavy set uncle or cousin” Thinking thinking…”either Emery or Avery.”
I heard the er in Emery and the ver in Avery. Turns out it was my Uncle Irving, my father’s brother who was big enough to be buried in a piano crate. He came through to say he was well and to manage your addictions on this side–it’s harder to do over there. Well, his addiction was to food, and maybe he was the one drinking–he had a terrible time fighting in Europe in WW2.  But my father and alcohol? There’s got to be another meaning. It must be a metaphor or she’s got the wrong energy.

OK, we’re on a roll. I asked if any female energies were coming through; I was hoping to find my departed best friend who I miss each day. Nope.

A spunky maternal figure popped in, possibly a neighbor who died of cancer. Well almost every woman on this block has had cancer and they were all spunky. But I was thinking on the wrong block… now wait you’ll get the chills: years ago when I lived in a high rise, I had a neighbor who was a best friend and mother figure. She was brilliant, feisty, talented. She taught me how to sew and knit. She was the first woman to have a loft on 7th Avenue in the garment district. She single-handedly fought off the mafia when they hit her up for money. She won the Coty medal. She was a mother figure, my role model.

The medium states: Emma? Sammie? something with an m sound in the middle. She’s patting you.

I started to cry. It’s Irma. I called her Irmie. I’ve missed her so! She started me on my Italian charm bracelet craze. you can even see the one she gave me before she died in a photo album on Multiply.

She’s appearing much younger, medium said with a chuckle. Irma was well into her 90s when she passed and always was perfectly dressed and coiffed.

I added that her son-in-law had recently died and I was at the funeral. Could she pull in the daughter’s name?

It’s got an R, she said.

I took a deep breath and typed, That’s Roz. She called her Rozzie.

Medium said she heard the z’s in the middle and was thinking Rizzo but Irma was shaking her head no! no!

I felt Irma hugging me. I found out I had a guardian angel–my own grandpa– who also was a husband many times over eons. I guess things get a bit incestuous in the universe. Maybe spirits have different rules. Maybe it just doesn’t matter in human terms. But the belief feels good.

The medium explained that your soul is who you are now..the cells have memory; in this life your spirit is a collection of those souls when we come down as spirit and create a “soul”  we carry with us the memory of the past lives.

I think I’ll give Rozzie a call. I know she’d love to hear from mom.

For more information: Medium Laura Evans On Blogger
ProPsychicChat Advisors
BlogTalkRadio

Comment deleted at the request of the thread owner.

reply greenwytch wrote on Aug 5, ’09 very interesting! i think it’s pretty darned cool you did this. LOVE the pic of your grandfather!

reply rosiefielding2 wrote on Aug 5, ’09 i too have had many experiances with the departed , i really do believe that we all have a spirit guide too.Rosie

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 5, ’09 greenwytch said very interesting! i think it’s pretty darned cool you did this. LOVE the pic of your grandfather! It wasn’t planned, it was a chain of events that led me to her. It is kinda cool!

reply greenwytch wrote on Aug 5, ’09 most definitely, it was meant to be!

reply wulfshado wrote on Aug 5, ’09 Wow this was awesome.

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 5, ’09 Thank you to my open minded readers.

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 5, ’09 greenwytch said very interesting! i think it’s pretty darned cool you did this. LOVE the pic of your grandfather! Some sounds askew but she certainly was picking up a lot of information. The feeling I was getting the physical reaction, I knew people who loved me were surrounding me.

reply greenwytch wrote on Aug 5, ’09 it’s good you gave it a go. staying stuck in the same old, same old makes for crotchety, stagnant old farts. OMG, eeeeuw……! ) ; D

Comment deleted at the request of the thread owner.

reply hadenough1 wrote on Aug 5, ’09 People like to believe in somethingInteresting

reply caffeinatedjo wrote on Aug 5, ’09 Cool, way cool! I think the spirits of those we loved and went before us surround us. I wonder if I were an espresso bean in a previous life? I hope I was not decaff ;).

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 5, ’09 a well roasted bean, indeed.

reply tulipsinspring wrote on Aug 5, ’09 This was an intense read, wow! Your grandfather was so handsome!I have mixed feelings about the idea of past lives, mostly because I do NOT want to come back here again. I think I’ve blogged about it before, but I have a recurring nightmare, which I have had since I was a small child, in which I’m somebody else, and I won’t tell the whole story, but it’s terrifying. I’ve also had a feeling of familiarity about certain times, and details of those times, that doesn’t come from a book. I predicted a death once too, when I was a child. Devastating. So I believe there is something to this, and I will check out her links. I’m glad you found her, and this must have been such an interesting experience! Thanks for sharing it, I’m curious to check out more. And I love this song, how perfectly it fits with this blog! Love you!

reply millimusings wrote on Aug 6, ’09 Absolutely fascinating Susan. I am glad that you went along with it if it has settled some thoughts that you have harboured over the years. Your grandfather certainly was a handsome young man, no doubts about that. So much gut feeling and inner knowing goes with these encounters. As one who believes that we live in the seen, felt, heard part of our being in a physical form here on this Earth, my thoughts on this subject and my inner knowing, tells me that there is more to our life force in the unknown which is unrecognisable to most of us in the human form …For reasons that we will later learn.. Such a good post Sue.

reply sousonne wrote on Aug 6, ’09 What an exciting experience for you….Wrote you a PM…

reply starfishred wrote on Aug 6, ’09 My grandfather comes to me a lot-I have been able to do this since I was a little girl-lucky my grandmother said let it folw don’t surpress it it is a gift use it wisely great blog sue-

reply sousonne wrote on Aug 6, ’09, edited on Aug 6, ’09 sanssouciblogs said It wasn’t planned, it was a chain of events that led me to her. Synchronicity

reply akunakumara wrote on Aug 6, ’09 A wonderful experience that is a true mind opener….Go with the flow and expand…

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 6, ’09 I remember my friend Irma, telling me lots of wonderful stories of her growing up in Germany. Her grandfather visited her and sat at the edge of the bed. She described him to her mother, he was in rabbinical garb.

reply hi2yisrael wrote on Aug 6, ’09 Your Grandfather is very handsome and your story is very interesting. ((HUGS))

reply rooanns wrote on Aug 6, ’09 Wow! that is intense. What an experience for you! Thanks for sharing it with us.

reply aimlessjoys wrote on Aug 6, ’09 Very interesting! Your grandpa certainly is a handsome figure. Synchronicity, huh?

reply sanssouciblogs wrote on Aug 8, ’09 aimlessjoys said Very interesting! Your grandpa certainly is a handsome figure. Synchronicity, huh? You know, I do think so, Aim!

reply sousonne wrote on Aug 8, ’09 sanssouciblogs said You know, I do think so, Aim! If you are aware of what synchronicity is, and what it involves….yes…(or I wouldn’t have said so….)

reply sweetpotatoqueen wrote on Aug 8, ’09 Oh goodness,this entry gave me goosebumps as I also believe that our souls do have a long memory that transcends the present state of our lives. One of my best friends died @40 after a long and drawn out struggle with cancer. During her illness we talked everyday on the phone…even on her worst days we never missed a call even if I did most of the talking to cheer her.Several months after this friend died my favorite Aunt also was dying from cancer. I was doing my last visit with this beloved Aunt and so very upset to be loosing her from this life. That night I dreamed that the phone rang and when I answered the ringing phone it was my departed friend on the other end assuring me she was okay and that my aunt would be also. Each and every time my life has had challenges I receive a phone call dream from this departed friend of mine….Oh yes..I do believe!!!!!!

editdeletereply lauritasita wrote on Aug 10, ’09, edited on Aug 10, ’09 Yeah, grandpa was a handsome one. I have the same feeling about driving on the highway. Still cannot do it. I have to take local roads wherever I go. Fascinating story, especially the part in the MRI machine. Very interesting. I’m very open to these things.

reply rosiesp wrote on Aug 10, ’09 Hey my friend Sue, I really enjoyed this read. Joanne put your Blog in my Favorites for me. You know me I’m far from smart when it comes to thlis stuff. Love ya, Rosie

reply aladybug wrote on Aug 23, ’09 I remember when you told me about this experience..! Wow! There are definitely other dimensions, I think, and it is amazing that some people have the capacity to make contact. I remember I loved a TV show of a man who contacted dead people from an audience… don’t remember the name of the show, but it was in the US…. I just LOVED that show!!! You brought on great memories. I would love to contact my brother, you know? Sigh… 🙂