Here we are back in the Migraine Corral.

I was doing well, really well for a time. I began taking Medical Marijuana but was more of a user of CBD oils in hopes of controlling my migraine issues. MIGRAINE. For those who follow my migraine saga, you know this has been a big deal with my health for well over eight years, and though I have always had it, actually since childhood, it morphed over the years into stages. While at work I would often take six extra strength Bufferin to get through the day. The pain headaches were terrible. But then the pain subsided and my vision went wonky. I remember sensing something was happening many years ago on a vacation when I was on a bike and speeding downhill on a trail. I couldn’t focus my eyes. That strange focus issue happened occasionally while still in my work years fifteen years ago. I couldn’t focus on a street sign. I assumed I needed new glasses. I always wear sunglasses outside. That was one thing my father insisted on due to light color and sensitivity.

The CBD oils were seemingly helpful and I began to see some control over the ocular migraines which were hitting me almost daily. I began taking a monthly drug which is self-injected and was gleeful that I hadn’t had a vertigo event in over a year. It is the migraine vertigo that is the worst: the violent spin out of nowhere, the total loss of control, the fear of falling, of throwing up, the feeling that my body heat went up 50°.

Why I no longer drive.

• I noticed that within the last two months my ocular migraines were creeping up in frequency, then in duration. Where I didn’t need any migraine prescription meds, now I was taking them again and hitting the Advil bottle, This was troublesome as I had just gone on a larger dose of Aimovig and I had convinced myself that I had found “the cure.” That the oils and the drug had my health under control. Then last week I had an eye-focus issue, just a brief one.But, then this morning it happened. Something I had convinced myself would never happen again: that out of control dizziness. I had to go back to bed for a few hours. it occurred just as I had just sat down at the computer and began to write. I had made a mental note of several things:
• my mother upset me yesterday: I was in no mood;
• I ate something that was too spicy for dinner the night before;
• I was sitting at the computer with my neck jutting forward.

I could go on and on about what is causing these health changes. Stress, well, yes, but no matter how much stress all of the symptoms were somewhat under control. There was a shift. Something. Something within me, be it physical or emotional. it is not likely that the hot pepper or my mother or my neck have anything to do with it. What we think we can control that is external, is a mere fantasy. We surely can’t control other people.

I am a caregiver to several people. I often forget about taking care of myself. This is likely a reminder from somewhere deep inside me. “Yoo-Hoo! I’m still here!! Remember me?”

We can’t control anything but the way we react to a situation. Excuse me while I figure out what I need and how to be nice to myself.

PS: remember: migraine is a complex neurological issue, not just a “headache.”

The first of the series on CBD oil/medical marijuana, begins here.

The previous post is here

The next post is here …