When my mother was a young woman, I wonder how she imagined her future; I bet she thought that she would get married, have children. Did she think she would have two children?  Did she think she would have grandchildren? Did she imagine she would lose her husband years later in 1991? Did she think she would ever get old, and if so what did she think old age would be like? How old did she imagine she would live to? Would she ever imagine that she, the little girl who was always ill, would outlive her three siblings and … Continue reading →

  “YOU NEVER BELIEVE ME!” Now she is the child who may or may not have taken something. Or carelessly crossed a street. Or misjudged the contents of a glass, or what was or was not in the closet. Now she is the child. She hung up on me.” I wrote about this here. For over a week I did not hear from my mother. She was cognizant that she had hung up on me, in fact she told the social worker that she was well aware and would call me “next week.” “Next week” came and went. As for … Continue reading →

When I wrote the previous blog and then lost it, I failed to realize when reconstructing it that there were other things on my mind. You can call it revenge but it is likely more like justice for the elderly. If the elderly aren’t treated righteously now, when we “get there,” we will be screwed. Here’s what I wanted to add. While my mother has always tended to see other people as a threat, as untrustworthy and nosy, I always had the opposite approach; until they proved themselves otherwise. You decide. And, by the way, what would you do? For … Continue reading →

The light at the end of the tunnel is not an illusion. The tunnel is. Where was I? It is now the middle of the sixth week of my ongoing challenges—to advocate on behalf of my mother; I continue to spin. Just when I think I can take some time off, the phone rings. It’s complicated. We are at a turning point. Actually, we are at several turning points. The boxes continue to pile with folders, the folders continue to expand. 1. I am still up against my mother’s doctor’s office. I have sent fax after fax, made call after … Continue reading →

The fearless girl sculpture facing the bull at Wall Street, NYC During the week I did a mini blog on facebook about my day, I posted the above photo. I awakened on that day and told myself that nothing was going to get in the way of solving an issue with my mother. That issue is small in comparison to what I face now. I feel like I am constantly being shot at with laser-bullets that are filled with problems. Just when I think I can breathe I can’t catch my breath. This is what is being shot at me … Continue reading →

Happy Sunday from a rainy New York City, friends. I’m glad you’re here as I need to unload. Life is funny: it is almost as if I am living in a ping pong game, I being the ball, am being batted over the net as the caretaker between the two teams: husband on one side and mother on the other. To wit: husband’s game is tomorrow, the day we journey to Manhattan to two different hospital buildings–one for a C-T scan and another, nine blocks away to have his twenty plus metal staples removed from his head and sutures removed … Continue reading →

The last we spoke I was reporting on an issue with my mother that led me to believe that I was viewing a decline in her orientation and functioning. But here’s the thing: that may have been true for that moment but all in all she is doing fine–it seems–she has been to the vitreo-retinal specialist for the second time and I was surprised and happy to see such a remarkable improvement in her retina. if you recall, she takes shots of a medication into the eye and it is working. I am not sure if her vision has improved … Continue reading →