What keeps us in the same place?
Is it comfort? Fear? Complacency? Habit?

Click to play >>

(A track from the Flushing House Band CD
recorded by members of the Flushing House Community, the senior residence;
How charming is this? singing; Susan Guerra, Tom Cherkin)

My mother moved to Florida in the 1980’s when her doctor advised her to “stay out of the cold;” she was plagued by respiratory issues, and allergies. And so she and my dad packed it in and left New York City. She grew roots in the sandy Florida soil and stayed. She missed New York, she was lonely in Florida especially after my father died … and three subsequent male companions died. There really wasn’t much in Florida for her, yet she hung onto the warm weather as her be all and end all. Case closed.

Case reopened.

On Friday I went back to the senior residence and brought a large folder of documents which were gone over for financial eligibility. My mother was “accepted.” It felt like one of my children was accepted to college. I chose an apartment, the best of the bunch. The one on the second floor next to the elevator would have been too noisy. The one on the eleventh floor was a considerable walk to the elevator. The one on the fifth floor was just right.

I went up to the roof for another breathtaking look at the view.

Sometimes it is just not the weather that has to be warm. One needs warm people, warm friendships, warm daily interactions. A good, heartwarming meal. I spoke to the dining room staff and unlike where my mother is now, everything is prepared fresh. I saw many happy employees and remarked that people looked like they wanted to be at work. Several I interviewed said just that: it is a great place to work. Where my mother now is, people are underpaid, overworked, not at peace. It’s time for a change, a big change. I am planning to uproot my mother and move her to this residence. Hopefully in July everything will fall into place. Pull those old roots out of their sandy base and replant them back in New York.

It’s going to be a big adjustment for all of us, but in the end, it is the right thing to do. There’s more to warm than weather.

The fifth floor: we lived on the fifth floor in Stuyvesant Town so many years ago.

It will all come full circle.

***

This series is linked: see “continued here.” Also, below the line there will be links for the previous post and the next.

The series starts here

continued here